The voices / 86 fragments

Ellen DeGeneres

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Archive entries

01Undated

My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

02Undated

Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

03Undated

Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

04Undated

When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

05Undated

You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

06Undated

Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

07Undated

It always helps to think about other people instead of ourselves.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

08Undated

Above all things physical, it is more important to be beautiful on the inside - to have a big hear and an open mind and a spectacular spleen.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

09Undated

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

10Undated

I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

11Undated

Procrastinate now, don't put it off.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

12Undated

I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

13Undated

Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe's way of saying stop, slow down, you move too fast. Listen to the music. Whoa whoa, listen to the music. Because music makes the people come together, it makes the bourgeois and the rebel. So come on people now, smile on your brother, everybody try to love one another. Because what the world needs now is love, sweet love. And I know that love is a battlefield, but boogie on reggae woman because you're gonna make it after all. So celebrate good times, come on. I've gotta stop I've gotta come to my senses, I've been out riding fences for so long... oops I did it again... um... What I'm trying to say is, if you leave tonight and you don't remember anything else that I've said, leave here and remember this: Procrastinate now, don't put it off.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

14Undated

Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

15Undated

What’s not so great is that all this technology is destroying our social skills. Not only have we given up on writing letters to each other, we barely even talk to each other. People have become so accustomed to texting that they’re actually startled when the phone rings. It’s like we suddenly all have Batphones. If it rings, there must be danger. Now we answer, “What happened? Is someone tied up in the old sawmill?”“No, it’s Becky. I just called to say hi.”“Well you scared me half to death. You can’t just pick up the phone and try to talk to me like that. Don’t the tips of your fingers work?

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

16Undated

Take a nap in a fireplace and you'll sleep like a log.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

17Undated

One time I actually cleaned out my closet so good I ended up on the cover of Time magazine.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

18Undated

Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim through your blood stream and tell funny jokes to each other. When they reach your brain,you hear what they're saying and that boosts your health and happiness. "Knock Knock... Who's There?.. Little endorphin... Little endorphin who?... Little Endorphin Annie." And then the endorphins laugh and then you laugh. See? Its Science.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

19Undated

Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also have to move the chair.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

20Undated

True beauty is not related to what color your hair is or what color your eyes are. True beauty is about who you are as a human being, your principles, your moral compass.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

21Undated

I enjoy growing older and wiser and learning from my mistakes every single day.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

22Undated

The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yourself.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

23Undated

Life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy by yourself and for yourself. Happiness comes from within. You have the power to change your own mindset so that all the negative, horrible thoughts that try to invade your psyche are replaced with happy, positive, wonderful thoughts.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote

24Undated

I hope I make people feel better. I hope I take people out of their situations a little bit and make them happier. That's really why I do what I do.

Ellen DeGeneres / quote