01UndatedYo Mama’s so ugly, her Mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
02UndatedChuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse kick you in the face.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
03UndatedChuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
08UndatedFor some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
09UndatedYo Mama’s so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
11UndatedYo Mama’s so poor, when I lit her house on fire, the cockroaches came out singing, “Clap your hands, stomp your feet, praise the Lord, we got some heat!Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
12UndatedYo Mama’s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, “Sorry, no professionals.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
13UndatedIf Yo Mama and Yo Daddy got a divorce, they'd still be brother and sister.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
16UndatedWhat’s the difference between Yo Mama and a 747?-About 20 pounds.-Yo mama carries more passengers.-Not everyone's been on a 747.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
20UndatedSuperman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.Oliver Oliver Reed / quote ↗
