04UndatedFor three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
05UndatedIf life was fair Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
06UndatedI know a man who gave up smoking drinking sex and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
07UndatedMy success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
08UndatedMail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
09UndatedNever continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
10UndatedFor days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
11UndatedHappiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
12UndatedI know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
13UndatedMarried men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
14UndatedI was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
15UndatedIf it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.Johnny Carson / quote ↗
16UndatedTalent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?'Johnny Carson / quote ↗
