01UndatedThere's a quote of hers [Lucille Ball] that I've always loved: 'I guess I would rather regret the things I've done than to regret the things I've never done.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
02UndatedDance, dance for meDance with the starsLaugh, laugh for meWherever you areSing, sing out loudLike angels doRemember meThe way I'll remember youLove, love for meWith all your soulCry, cry for meAs I grow oldSee, see me from the edge of Heaven's eyeFeel for me 'cause feelings never dieI'll remember youMy very special friendUntil we meet again(By Carrie Hamilton, Carol Burnett's daughter)Carol Burnett / quote ↗
03UndatedI have always grown from my problems and challenges from the things that don't work out. That's when I've really learned.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
06UndatedEverybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
07UndatedMy mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
10UndatedCelebrity was a long time in coming it will go away. Everything goes away.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
11UndatedBut I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
13UndatedI'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn't spend the money today.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
14UndatedI do the 'New York Times' crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
15UndatedBut I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
16UndatedIt's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
17UndatedMy interesting diet tips are eat early and don't nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
18UndatedMy grandmother and I saw an average of eight movies a week, double features, second run.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
19UndatedMy grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
20UndatedI'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
21UndatedFunny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
22UndatedEdgy is fine - I'm not a prude by any stretch of the imagination - but what's wrong with a good ol' belly laugh? I miss that.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
24UndatedI wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.Carol Burnett / quote ↗
