01c. 1970 ADI'll always want him. Until every sun goes dark in every sky, until I am nothing more than long-forgotten cosmic dust, I will want him. And even then I suspect my particles will long for his.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
02c. 1970 ADI’m not a woman you bring home to Mother, pick out china patterns with, or Mary forefend, breed. I’ve seen a chunk of the universe, true, but there’s still so much more to see. I doubt I’ll ever cure this wanderlust, and I’m content with dedicating my life to failing to sate it... He’s never going to sit at my feet and write me poems, which is good because I hate poetry, except dirty ones that rhyme.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
03c. 1970 ADWe're broken in complementary ways, thus rendering our damage comprehensible to each other.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
04c. 1970 ADHe is not the same person as when wemet, but . . . neither am I. Time has refined us, but instead of pushing us apart, we’re closer than ever.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
05c. 1970 AD. . . and I don’t expect him to suborn his life into mine any more than I would change my dreams for him. We’re not one soul, one being, however much we love each other.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
06c. 1970 ADFor I need this scar over my heart to remind me. Crazy as it sounds, if I can bear the wound on my body, it lessens what I must carry on my soul. How he knew that about me, I cannot fathom.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
07c. 1970 ADWe stand a professional distance apart, as if I can’t feel his pain screaming in my head. Mine amplifies his; they share a joint sound—that of glass breaking—until they swell to a crescendo that deafens.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
10c. 1970 ADSo I make no effort to hide my pain. I don’t ever put it all on display like this—but for today and all the rest of the days of the trial, I must. My every flinch, every flicker of pain, will bemagnified a hundred times over, then dissected by the pundits and talking heads. But I’m told it’s necessary; the world needs to see me vulnerable and wounded. I cannot appear not to care or to lack remorse, but that removes a crucial component of my self- defense mechanism and leaves me bleeding for all the world to see. I suppose that’s rather the point.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
11c. 1970 ADYou can lie to yourself about all kinds of things. Until you can't, anymore. Until reality pounds a hole through your fantasy castle and the reality check must be cashed in.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
12c. 1970 ADPull yourself together. People among the living still need your help, and I haven't given you permission to quit.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
13c. 1970 ADI knew exactly how he felt because I had walked in his shoes, wary and distrustful, unable to believe anybody could care about me without asking for something in return.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
14c. 1970 ADYou think a man doesn't fall down, son? A real man falls down nine times and gets up ten. You think real men don't get scared? We do, all the time, especially when the people we love can be taken away from us. The key to manhood is being there, every morning when she wakes up, every night before she goes to bed. That's what a man does. It has nothing to do with how good you are with some shiny knives. And if you let her do this thing alone, then by God—Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
15c. 1970 ADLessons in magic from a mysterious boy who belonged to a hidden Ferisher court called the Wild — I couldn't think of anything that would horrify my parents more. Therefore, the proposition became exponentially more enticing.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
16c. 1970 ADBecause it takes more courage to heal the world's hurts than to inflict them.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
19c. 1970 ADI get it. You'd rather have him, broken, than me whole. If that didn't clarify my chances with you, nothing would. But you can't have what you want either, Deuce. I can't be your friend, feeling like this. Give me some time, and then... Maybe. No promises.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
20c. 1970 ADFor love to flourish there has to be trust. Promises don’t matter as much aspersonal choice.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
23c. 1970 ADIt was a thing that could not be articulated or explained. It merely was, like the sunrise or a sheer and sudden drop to the giant water that had stolen my breath, where the land ended in the ruins. My love for Fade strengthened me, made me determined never to give up. I would follow him until the world stopped or until I found him. I believed love hadn’t weakened me or left me soft; instead it made me powerful, determined beyond all belief.Ann Aguirre / quote ↗
