quote · Legacy record
I didn't totally fit in. I kind of disintegrated around people and became what they wanted me to be. But paradoxically, I felt an intensity inside me all the time. I didn't know what it was, but it kept building, like water behind a dam. Later, when I was properly depressed and anxious, I saw the illness as an accumulation of all that thwarted intensity. A kind of breaking through. As though, if you find it hard enough to let your self be free, your self breaks in, flooding your mind in an attempt to drown all those failed half-versions of you.
I didn't totally fit in. I kind of disintegrated around people and became what they wanted me to be. But paradoxically, I felt an intensity inside me all the time. I didn't know what it was, but it kept building, like water behind a dam. Later, when I was properly depressed and anxious, I saw the illness as an accumulation of all that thwarted intensity. A kind of breaking through. As though, if you find it hard enough to let your self be free, your self breaks in, flooding your mind in an attempt to drown all those failed half-versions of you.
Approximate author period: c. 1975 AD · modern
Meaning not yet available
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- Author or tradition
- Matt Haig
Attribution: attributed - Country attributed
- Not established
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- Approximate author period: c. 1975 AD · modern
Approximate author-period anchor from documented birth year 1975; activity date not established; Wikidata Q926682, https://www.wikidata.org/wiki/Q926682 (accessed 2026-10-08). Not a quotation composition date.
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Supplied reference C; CSV row 169666; supplied attribution, independently unverified
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