proverb · Words worth keeping
Kissing goes by favour.
Kissing goes by favour.
Understand the thought
Meaning in plain English
Affection or special treatment may follow personal preference rather than an impartial rule. The saying can expose favouritism in shared decisions, but freely chosen affection is different from unfairly allocating a responsibility, benefit or opportunity that needs a fair process.
Example
A club notices that desirable exhibition slots keep going to the organiser’s friends and agrees on published selection criteria for the next event.
Deeper explanation and when to use it
The kiss represents something given by preference, so favour directs who receives it. Figuratively, the expression may describe a situation where personal liking or connections influence access to a benefit. Whether that is a problem depends on what is being offered. Affection is freely chosen; no one is owed a kiss or a relationship through an equal-allocation rule. A shared role or public opportunity, however, may call for clear criteria rather than private preference. A useful reading identifies which kind of choice is at issue before making an accusation. It can question an unfair process without turning someone’s personal boundaries into evidence of injustice.
When to use it
Use it to discuss personal preference in a decision, while distinguishing affection from shared responsibilities.
Keep in mind
Affection requires consent; an allegation of favouritism needs evidence about the actual process.
An interpretation of the words, not a claim about their earliest origin.
Attribution & collection notes
- Author or tradition
- Traditional
Attribution: traditional - Country attributed
- Not established
A country attribution does not establish the earliest origin. - Historical period
- Date unknown
- Culture
- English