01UndatedI remember thinking how easy it is to speak in clichés, to steal a line from pulp fiction and let it fall. We can only hover around the inexpressible with our words anyway, and there is comfort in saying what we have heard before.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
02UndatedThat is the strangeness of language: it crosses the boundaries of the body, is at once inside and outside, and it sometimes happens that we don't notice the threshold has been crossed.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
03UndatedThere's a phenomenology of being sick, one that depends on temperament, personal history, and the culture which we live in.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
04UndatedTransformation of the self are related to where you are, and identity Is dependent on others.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
05UndatedMy mother said the bizarre name Raccoona had surely been inspired, at least on a subliminal level, by the masks raccoons don't wear but simply have - the ones given them by nature..... [S]he pointed out that Le Guin had suspected all along that Raccoona and Tiptree were two authors that came from the same source, but in a letter to Alice she wrote that she preferred Tiptree to Raccoona: 'Raccoona, I think, has less control, thus less wit and power.'Le Guin, Mother said, had understood something deep. 'When you take on a male persona, something happens.'When I asked her what that was, she sat back in her chair, waved her arm, and smiled. 'You get to be the father.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
06UndatedThis feeling of being "home at last" corresponds to my idea about the city, and idea shaped by books, movies, and plays, an idea of infinite possibility.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
07UndatedThe bottle of red brush on a white table gleamed throughout the remaining years of my childhood as the sign of what was possible there.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
08UndatedWithin weeks of my arrival in New York, I was someone else, not because there had been a revolution in my psychological makeup or any trauma. It was simply this: people saw me in a light in which I had never been seen before.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
09UndatedThat night as I lay in bed, I thought of several things I could have said and mourned the fact that my wit usually bloomed late, peaking when it no longer mattered, during the solitary hours close to midnight.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
10UndatedWe all start out the same in our mothers' wombs. We, all of us, when floating in the amniotic sea of our earliest oblivion, have gonads. If the Y chromosome didn't swoop in to act on the gonads of some of us and make testes, we would all become women. In biology, the Genesis story is reversed: Adam becomes Adam out of Eve, not the other way around.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
11UndatedThe stories and pictures I make for the lives of the people closest to me are the forms of my empathy.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
12UndatedIt encapsulates so neatly the lesson of expectation and reality that it could serve as a parable. The fact that tomatoes are good is beside the point. If you think you're getting an apple, a tomato will revolt you. That New York should be nicknamed the Big Apple, that an apple is the fruit of humankind's first error and the expulsion from paradise, that America and paradise have been linked and confused ever since Europeans first hit its shores, makes the story reverberate as myth.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
13UndatedIf not violently overthrown, expectation can have a power in itself, can invest a place with what literally isn't there.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
14UndatedI had never seen anything like New York, and its newness held the promise of my future: dense with the experience I craved - romantic, urbane, intellectual. Looking back on that moment, I believe I was saved from disappointment by the nature of my "great expectations." I honestly wasn't burdened with conventional notions of finding security and happiness. At that time of my life, even when I was "happy," it wasn't because I expected it. That was for characters less romantic than myself. I didn't expect to be rich, well fed, and kindly treated by all. I wanted to live deeply and fully, to embrace whatever the city held for me.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
15UndatedI've always thought of wholeness and integration as necessary myths. We're fragmented beings who cement ourselves together, but there are always cracks. Living with the cracks is part of being, well, reasonably healthySiri Hustvedt / quote ↗
17UndatedAgain, I don't fully understand my emotion response to the library or trust it. It was the site of a series of intellectual revelations that were crucial to me, not just as a student but as a human being.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
18UndatedI said very little. I knew that for the time being I was the open air, the place to put the words, not a real interlocutor. And then, ekthout a transition of any kind, she began to tell me .... {p. 134}Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
19UndatedNew York City is the place where people come to invent, reinvent, or find the room they need to be who they wish to be.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
20UndatedBut all attractions are alike,' he said. 'They come from an emptiness inside.' He hammered on this chest with his index finger. 'Something's missing and you have to fill it. Books, paintings, people, they're all the same...''A lot of people do without books and paintings.''True,' he said, 'but that doesn't affect the argument.' Paris turned his head to one side and chewed on his lip. 'Of course, nothing ever does the trick. Nobody's really satisfied for long.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
21UndatedCreativity has always depended on openness and flexibility, so let us hope for more of both in the future.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
22UndatedMost of us accept that although we may believe our dreams to be real events, upon waking, we can tell the difference between nocturnal hallucinations and reality.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
23UndatedThere is no reason we should expect young children to enter the nocturnal darkness of sleep and dreams without help.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗
24UndatedThe English expression 'to fall asleep' is apt because the transition between waking and sleeping is a gradual drop from one state of being into another: a giving up of full self-consciousness for unconsciousness or for the altered consciousness of dreams.Siri Hustvedt / quote ↗