01UndatedWhat I have a problem with is not so much religion or god, but faith. When you say you believe something in your heart and therefore you can act on it, you have completely justified the 9/11 bombers. You have justified Charlie Manson. If it's true for you, why isn't it true for them? Why are you different? If you say "I believe there's an all-powerful force of love in the universe that connects us all, and I have no evidence of that but I believe it in my heart," then it's perfectly okay to believe in your heart that Sharon Tate deserves to die. It's perfectly okay to believe in your heart that you need to fly planes into buildings for Allah.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
03UndatedIf every trace of any single religion were wiped out and nothing were passed on, it would never be created exactly that way again. There might be some other nonsense in its place, but not that exact nonsense. If all of science were wiped out, it would still be true and someone would find a way to figure it all out again.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
04UndatedIt's not arrogant to say that you can't figure out the answers to the universe with your internal faith. It's not arrogant to know that there's no omniscient, omnipotent prime mover in the universe who loves you personally. It's not sad to feel that life and the love of your real friends and family is more than enough to make life worth living. Isn't it much sadder to feel that there is a more important love required than the love of the people who have chosen to spend their limited time with you?Penn Jillette / quote ↗
05UndatedOnce you've condoned faith in general, you've condoned any crazy shit done because of faith.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
06UndatedBut [he] had lost god, and all his family and friends were staying behind with his imaginary friend. A silly dream goes away and takes with it your whole real life.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
07UndatedAs I’m fond of saying, if you want to find utopia, take a sharp right on money and a sharp left on sex and it’s straight ahead.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
08UndatedThe only difference between Obama and Bush is that Obama is killing more people. He’s about double the numbers now. Can you imagine if McCain had won and did precisely what Obama has done, with every speech and every political maneuver overseas? There’d be riots in the streets about the people we’re killing. And yet because it’s Obama, and he’s better looking and better at reading the teleprompter, we let him get away with it.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
09UndatedTechnology adds nothing to art. Two thousand years ago, I could tell you a story, and at any point during the story I could stop, and ask, Now do you want the hero to be kidnapped, or not? But that would, of course, have ruined the story. Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
10UndatedNobody that has seen a baby born can believe in god for a second. When you see your child born, and the panic, and the amount of technology that is saving the life of the two people you love most in the world, when you see how much stainless steel and money it takes to fight off the fact that god wants both those people dead, no one, no one can look into the eyes of a newborn baby and say there's a god, because I'll tell ya, if we were squatting in the woods, the two people I love most would be dead. There's just no way around that. If I were in charge, no way. We need technology to fight against nature; nature so wants us dead. Nature is trying to kill us.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
11UndatedDemocracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up against the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
12UndatedYou don’t have to be brave or a saint, a martyr, or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is “I don’t know”.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
13UndatedIf there's something you really want to believe, that's what you should question the most.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
15Undated[On hearing that 86% of gay teens have experienced harassment] Eighty-six percent? Eighty-six per-fuckin-cent WERE harassed?! That means fourteen per-fuckin-cent WEREN'T harassed? WHAT?!At MY school a hundred percent of the children - gay, straight, transgendered, bi, sell... or trade - WERE harassed. She's saying that fourteen percent of the gay students were NOT harassed? That seems impossible.At MY school any one of us would have sucked Elton John's COCK at a mandatory school assembly for a fourteen percent chance of NOT being harassed.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
16UndatedHas any non-dipshit man ever used the word "ladies" not followed by the word "room"?Penn Jillette / quote ↗
18UndatedWe are only here for a little while, and our bodies belong to ourselves and no one else.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
19UndatedBehaving morally because of a hope of reward or a fear of punishment is not morality. Morality is not bribery or threats. Religion is bribery and threats. Humans have morality. We don't need religion.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
20UndatedA lot of people, to attack an outspoken atheist, one of the things they'll do is say, 'You are as bad as the fundamentalist Christians.' And my answer is always, 'I hope so.'Penn Jillette / quote ↗
21UndatedThe highest ideals are human intelligence, creativity and love. Respect these above all.Penn Jillette / quote ↗
22UndatedBacon is so good by itself that to put it in any other food is an admission of failure. You're basically saying, 'I can't make this other food taste good, so I'll throw in bacon.'Penn Jillette / quote ↗
23UndatedA joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a failure.'Penn Jillette / quote ↗
24UndatedI'm always fascinated by the use of the first-person plural talking about sports.Penn Jillette / quote ↗