01c. 1994 ADFor the first time I could remember, I felt weak, woozy and stupid— like a human-being. Like a very small and helpless human-being.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
02c. 1994 ADI had become a perfect fake human, saying the stupid and pointless things that humans say to each other all day long.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
03c. 1994 ADIt was clear to me that it wouldn't matter what I did - they would never truly appreciate me or learn what I had to offer. They were far beyond fickle - they were insensible, like kittens,predatory little things, distracted by the first bit of string or shiny bauble that rolled across the floor, and nothing I could ever say or do could possibly make any kind of dent in their willful ignorance.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
05c. 1994 ADOf course it was a terrible thing, and the world would be a much better place without someone in it who could do that, but did that mean we had to miss lunch?Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
07c. 1994 ADIn my life long study of human beings, I have found that no matter how hard they try, they have found no way yet to prevent the arrival of Monday morning. And they do try, of course, but Monday always comes, and all the drones have to scuttle back to their dreary workday lives of meaningless toin and suffering.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
09c. 1994 ADRectory always sounded to me like a place you would find a proctologist.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
10c. 1994 ADIt took me a moment. I blinked, and suddenly it swam into focus and I had to frown very hard to keep myself from giggling out loud like the schoolgirl Deb had accused me of being. Because he had arranged the arms and legs in letters, and the letters spelled out a single small word: BOO. The three torsos were carefully arranged below the BOO in a quarter-circle, making a cute little Halloween smile. What a scamp.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
13c. 1994 ADReally now: If you can't get me my newspaper on time, how can you expect me to refrain from killing people?Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
15c. 1994 ADWhatever made me the way I am left me hollow, empty inside, unable to feel. It doesn't seem like a big deal.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
16c. 1994 ADIt's always me, isn't it? I'm not really a very nice person, but for some reason it's always me that they come to with their problems.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
17c. 1994 ADA man who discovers his pants are on fire tends to have very little time to worry about somebody else's box of matchesJeff Lindsay / quote ↗
18c. 1994 ADDoakes had a first name! It was Albert - had anyone ever really called him that? Unthinkable. I had assumed his name was Sergeant.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
21c. 1994 ADThe mission sat in a converted store front on the corner of a medium-busy street. There was a small crowd gathered in front - no real surprise, since they gave out food and clothing, all all you had to do was spend a few moments of your life listening to the good reverend explain why you were going to Hell. It seemed like a pretty good bargain, even to me, but I wasn't hungry.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
22c. 1994 ADLife teaches us that human thought almost never walks hand in hand with logic, and it is usually counterproductive to raise the point.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
23c. 1994 ADAnybody can be charming if they don't mind faking it, saying all the stupid, obvious, nauseating things that a conscience keeps most people from saying. Happily, I don't have a conscience. I say them.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
24c. 1994 ADAlways marveling at how New Age pseudo-philosophy had taken over the Internet.Jeff Lindsay / quote ↗
