01UndatedSo here were the facts: I felt possessive of her. Not in a romantic sort of way, but in a "hit her over the head, drag her off by the hair, and fuck her" way. Like she was my toy and I was keeping the other boys in the sandbox from playing with her. How sick was that? If she ever heard me admit to that, she would cut off my balls and feed them to me.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
02UndatedYou sure you don't want me to bring you back something?" Her eyes moved in the direction of his office. "A hit man? Some holy water?Christina Lauren / quote ↗
03UndatedHe closes the door with a determined click, and I hear him call to a flight attendant, and I sink down onto the toilet seat, resting my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands as I listen to him through theChristina Lauren / quote ↗
04UndatedSteve Perry versus Arnel Pineda. At his confused expression, I explain, "The guy on YouTube who gained a following for covering Journey songs...then eventually became the new lead singer for the band?Christina Lauren / quote ↗
05UndatedI forgot how it feels, how insanely different it is to make love, not just hook up of get off. It isn't two bodies coming into contact for pleasure alone. It's the weird sense of getting inside that person, turning sex into a fucking revelation.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
06UndatedShe was like a fire-cracker standing too close to a match: all potential energy, still wrapped up so neatly. He wanted to watch her explode. Hell, he was the match. He wanted to make her explode.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
07UndatedTo her, not packing our lunches every day or joining the PTA is a feminist rallying cry.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
08UndatedOne month flies by when you're falling love with the woman you're using for sex. Two is an eternity when the woman you love leaves you.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
09UndatedHis voice is both low and quiet, and it has this hypnotic rhythm to it. I wonder whether someday he'll give sermons with that voice, whether he'll throw down judgement with that voice.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
10UndatedWe're only three class sessions in and I'm already behind? And to hear it from him? This buttoned-up Bible-thumper I can't get out of my head?Christina Lauren / quote ↗
12UndatedHe's not recruiting me to the oiled-up Gay Bliss Club of Northern Utah, but to the LDS Church.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
13UndatedI can't read him. I can't grasp him. I have no idea what he's thinking and if he's messing with me or if he really is this good, but never before have I wanted so fiercely to learn forward and put my mouth on someone's neck, begging them to want me.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
14UndatedLight bursts behind my closed eyes, so intensely I nearly hear the popping sound. It's my brain melting, or my world ending, or maybe we've just been hit by a meteor and this is the rapture and I'm given one last perfect moment before I'm sent to purgatory and he;s sent somewhere much, much better.It isn't his first kiss - I know that - but it's his first real one.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
16UndatedI am a monster beneath him, with arching hips, an octopus with hands everywhere at once. I don't think anything in the history of time has felt this good.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
17UndatedThe things that I love about you aren't going to go away when you go on your book tour, and they're not going to go away when you go on your mission. I'll still be here, and I'll still be thinking about all those things. I'll still be working on being a better person, a better friend, a better son. I'll still be wondering what it would be like to be a better boyfriend for you. And you will be on your mission, thinking about how much you wish your weren't gay.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
18UndatedMaybe I'm crying because I'm terrified that he's come here to do more damage, to reactivate what I feel only to let me down easy again, missionary style.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
20UndatedLook, I wanted to mention something to you," I said. Play it off as casual. Play it off as no big deal. Be cool.Her lips curled up in an amused smile. "Okay?""You know what a horrible prankster Will can be." She nodded and I continued: "I may have just done something to get back at him and I swear," I said, resting a hand on her shoulder, "I swear, Hanna, you'll think it's hilarious... eventually.""Eventually?""Absolutely. Eventually."She considered me through narrowed eyes. "This is just a prank, right? No shaved heads or scars?"I pulled back to study her. "That was a very specific question. Scars?" I shook my head, clearing it. "And no, no, no, no. Just a silly little prank." I gave Hanna my best smile, the one Chloe said made panties drop. But apparently it only made Hanna more suspicious.Her eyes narrowed further. "What would I need to do?""Nothing," I said. "You'll probably see some weird stuff but just... go along with it.""So, basically be oblivious.""Exactly," I said."And this will be funny?""Hilarious."She thought about it for a full ten seconds before reaching out to shake my hand. "You're on.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
21UndatedWhat is even happening here?" Will said, looking to each of us and the back to wherever the cougars had wandered off to."Am I drunk? Hanna, they just pinched my ass and this one"- he motioned to George- "wants to claim me for his own. A little help?"Hanna took a drink off her frilly drink, complete with big pink umbrella and some sort of neon glow stick. "I don't know, you seem to be doing pretty well on your own there," she said, then took another long pull of her straw.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
22UndatedThere are moments in life where I wonder whether things can get worse. I'm on a plane, with my new husband, whose enthusiasm for this whole thing seems to be flagging, and it's in this deep moment of self-pity that I register–with absolute horror–that I've also just started my period.I look down at my white jeans and stifle a sob...Christina Lauren / quote ↗
23UndatedJulia", I answered breathlessly. "Chloe, are you in the bathroom fucking that nice slice of man cake?" "I'll be there in a second, okay?" I ended the call and shoved the phone back into my bag. I looked up at him, feeling my rational side return after the small interruption. "I should go." "Look, I-" He was cut off as my phone rang again. I answered without bothering to look at the screen. "God, Julia! I’m not in here fucking the piece of man cake!" "Chloe?" Joel's confused voice sounded through the phone. "Oh... hi." Shit. This could not be happening to me.Christina Lauren / quote ↗
24UndatedFigure out how to balance Oliver with a career you’ve wanted your whole life,” he tells me. “Because you’ll end up with neither if you think you have to choose.Christina Lauren / quote ↗